Saturday, January 10, 2009

I am very distressed about my weight. Embarrassed and pissed off. Two years ago I started running and working out and then I did the South Beach diet and I lost 70 lbs. 7-0. I sit here, 2 years later, with 65 of those 70lbs strapped right back on. My excuse or reasons are many. Depression and the drugs that go with it, my foot pain, my laziness and love of food. Whatever the excuse, I know that I have to start back over and do it again. And I know it can be done. That being said, this will be my only post that is totally about my weight. Being fat is like having an STD. It's like wearing a big hat that says "I have the Clap" only you can't take the hat off. And everyone is really embarrassed for you, except for the other Clap-hat wearers. They're just glad they're not alone. And so I don't really want to bore everyone and humiliate myself through this whole process. That's why last night I decided to create a private blog that is strictly a diet and exercise journal. So private that it's (hopefully) not open to the public. It's MY Clap-hat, dammit.


Rapunzel said...

I completely understand how you're feeling! I am at my highest weight ever and am just sick over it.

I considered making my "diet" blog private as well but at the moment I'm taking my chances and exposing myself. ;-)

If you decide to allow certain readers, I'd be honored to be considered. I promise I won't judge you for your "clap," I've got plenty enough of my own over here.

jan said...

Dearest Rapunzel- Consider yourself considered.

The first post on my other blog is pictures. Terribly unappealing, unatractive, tear inducing pictures of myself. As soon as I get past the terror I'll let you know.

P.S. thanks for the support!

Rapunzel said...

Jan, I am here for you. Please be gentle with yourself, my friend, you are beautiful, inside and out, weight has no bearing on that.