Friday, July 1, 2011

His Head On A Skewer


So basically all Bea wants to eat these days is Whiskas Temptation treats and the juice off of canned food. Oh, and Kraft Parmesan shaker cheese. She's driving us rat-shit, bat-shit crazy. She seems fine. She's skinny as hell, but she's also fifteen frickin' years old. Anyway, we're tired of worrying and wringing our hands over her furry little carcass so we're taking her to the vet tomorrow to see if anything's the matter with her. Other than the obvious.

On my way home from work today I pulled into the Walgreens parking lot. So there's this silver Beetle backing out of a parking space and I stop to let them out. I'm thinking about stuff and things and the car's slowly backing out and I'm like, "Jayzus, it's taking this little old lady forever." Eventually they're all the way out and I'm prepared to go about my business, only the Beetle's still backing up. Still backing. Still backing. I'm honking like mad but I can't pull around them because they arc around and slam into my drivers side door and wheel well. So I swear. Loudly and profusely. And get out of my car. But I'm the only one around to hear the swearing because the Beetle is EMPTY. Yup. Empty. As in no driver. As in, long story short, the Beetle's parking brake doesn't work and now I have a minor dent and some scratches in the Fit. I tracked down the Beetle's owner and got her info and seriously... I really wish my Daddy was around so I could tell him about Bea and my car. Daddy never tired of animal companion and effed up vehicle stories.

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