Thursday, March 28, 2013

Keeping It Elevated


We bought a house a couple of weeks ago.  It's pretty awesome even if it was a huge hassle and everyone involved in the process acted as though this was their first time dealing with such, even though I know that it wasn't.  It was my first time buying a house and I think I knew more than the lender and the lawyer just by Googling it for 15 minutes.  It was a mess and a nightmare and I'm pretty sure I made at least one enemy for life, but I gots my gotdang house and a happier person, I could not be.  So, we've been in said house for less than two weeks.  This past Monday morning I was leaving for work and slipped down our back deck and broke my damn ankle.  Thirty-six years I've gone without breaking anything more than a major sweat and a week after I pledge my last dollar to the bank, I break a bone.  My first thought was "Goddammit!Goddammit!Goddammit!" on account of it hurt a whole freakin' lot and I came very close to puking.  The next thought was, "This house is trying to kill me."  But here's the deal:  We did a house blessing before we brought any of our stuff in.  I'm talking sage and salt and prayer and meditation and asking the Earth Mama and the little baby Jebus  to rid the house of any negative or malicious juu-juu.  And I firmly believe that it worked.  So after a couple of days of contemplation and of being waited on hand and foot by John and watching him clean and fix things and make me coffee and bowls of Cheerios and baloney and cheese sammiches, I have come to the realization that this broken foot thing, well, it might not be a negative.  Maybe, it is in fact a big positive with a few minor negatives attached.  The main positive is that it's totally making John feel like a useful, productive member of society.  He's a homeowner, and for now he's the only functioning homeowner in this home, because I can't even pee without needing to make sure he's standing outside the bathroom door in case I can't get up off the bowl. Point is, this is doing wonders for his self-esteem.  Which in turn does wonders for my disposition because I'm not having to reassure him nearly as much as he once required.  The negatives are the accumulating hospital bills and having to file for short-term disability and other financial woes that are pretty much a daily task anyway.  Oh, and the broken ankle and the possibility of having to have surgery in a couple of weeks.  But for now, for this moment, I'm good.  I get to spend lots of time in my new house with my not new paramour.  I don't have to cook or clean.  I can read and write and tweet and pester the cats and text my sisters and make an ass out of myself on FB at my own leisure.  I can work on my British accent by watching copious amounts of Masterpiece and I can work on my pectorals by swinging myself around on my walker and crutches.  Everything little thing is gonna be just fine.